Current Emotion: Joy and Jesus

"What do you want, beloved?"

I want to be filled with joy again.

"Why?"

Because this hurts. This anxiety feels like it's choking me...it keeps me away from you, keeps me from truly living my life. I miss the joy-filled days that were only a few months ago, days without fear.

"Do you want the joy of my presence, or to simply not be afraid?"

Diaries of a Summer Intern: Multiple Weeks, Multiple Emotions, Multiple Blessings

My goal at the beginning of this summer was to write out my thoughts and feelings each week, in order to decompress through everything going on during this steady yet crazy summer. Obviously, it hasn't gone according to plan.

Well, not according to my plan.

Current Emotion: Mourning Nana

Dear Nana,

I miss you more with every day that goes by. Even though at the same time I do miss you a little bit less, because I grow more and more accustomed to the vacancy in my life and heart, the paradox of life brings about the ache of missing you penetrating just a little deeper as well.

The Struggle is Real - and Worth It

This was a post that I started and never found the right words to finish it. I was still processing through a lot of the things that I speak about, and so I didn't exist in a place where I could speak from every conviction of my heart. The Lord has been working on me a lot, and I hope I can now speak a little more clearly about what Jesus has been ministering to me about "struggling" through life.

I love spring.

Everything comes alive, spring break happens, Easter comes and we celebrate the Resurrection openly, and the sun is often out way more than during the winter.

Where I Belong...

I've been lonely this summer. Not constantly, but it has been a recurring theme.

This weekend, several of my most cherished people - most of my homegroup - came into town for a big, weekend-long summer homegroup hangout. It was probably the highlight of my summer so far.

Diaries of a Summer Intern: Week Four

I'm starting to notice something about the world. It's something that I've always known, but now it's beginning to become a challenge to overcome and learn how to walk through it as Jesus would desire me to.

The pride of having to be the person who's right about something.

Diaries of a Summer Intern: Week Two? More Like Week Three!

It's been quite a busy, busy past few weeks. Nothing exceptional happened last week during the work week, and between not being sure what I wanted to write about and then going back to my college town for the weekend to visit friends and celebrate my beau's birthday, Week Two slipped away.

But Week Three...man, it's been crazy. I still have one more day of work tomorrow, but I already feel like I've put in far too many hours. Let's start with the Attack of the Chiggers.

Diaries of a Summer Intern: Week One

Well, it’s that time of year again. Finals have finished, graduation has occurred, a bunch of people have gotten married. The temperatures are rising and days are becoming longer as summer sets in. For some, it brings summer school. For others, vacations. For me, a job. (And you have people in any combination of those plus other things)

Sunday night before I started working Monday morning I could barely sleep.

Current Emotion: Overwhelmed About the Future

This is it, guys.  I’m heading into senior year as soon as summer ends. Why am I already thinking about the end of the summer when summer just started? Because it’s making me cry. It’s that time in life where everyone wants to know what I’m going to do; everyone wants an answer to my future, and half of them want something like “get an awesome job,” “go to grad school,” or “get married,” and frankly, I don’t know the answer to anything right now.